What Are You Avoiding Right Now?
"Brainy What-Why-How"
Your weekly nibble of science-backed goodness to help you move better and feel unstoppable.
🧠
What (the TL:DR)
You lie to yourself.
We all do.
It's part of being human.
But bringing awareness to it can move you from:
🚗 something that happens, (you're in the passenger seat)
🚗 something that you check, and change directions (you're driving)
This shift changes everything: how you train, how you sit with yourself, how you show up in life.
Why (the geeky psychology)
Albert Bandura -- a 20th century psychologist -- developed a concept called Moral Disengagement. He was trying to answer:
How do ordinary people do harmful things, without feeling like bad people?
Through his 8 Mechanisms of Moral Disengagement* he shows how harmful behaviour isn't as simple as bad people doing bad things.
It's more about the mental tricks that make uncomfortable truths easier to avoid.
It goes like this:
Reality gets uncomfortable:
in life: suffering, environmental harm, "OMG I have to tell my boss I'm quitting to go fulfil my dreams of being a travelling fire dancer."
in movement: fatigue, plateaus
in meditation: restlessness, dark thoughts
The mind spins a story to soften it:
justification "it's fine."
comparison "well I'm doing better than..."
blame "it's not my fault..."
☝️ I've also caught myself saying these to friends who are dealing with problems. So we do this to each other as well, "to be a good friend". But sometimes maybe our friends need some tough love
You disconnect from what's actually happening:
you protect your identity / ego
you protect the illusion of "I've got this shit figured out."
How (apply it to your life)
Don't try to "fix" this very human tendency towards disengagement. You'll just create a shiny new story.
Instead, use it as a signal:
1️⃣ Catch yourself in the act
.... go on...think of something in your life that you're avoiding right now. A difficult conversation, or giving up the convenience of a certain business you know you ought to boycott, or just taking responsibility for your lack of progress towards a goal...
Are you:
blaming?
justifying?
skirting around the issue?
comparing to people doing worse?
downplaying the consequences?
2️⃣ Get curious about what's underneath:
is it fear?
are you protecting your ego?
is it just fatigue? confusion?
is there shame here?
3️⃣ Come back to your body:
Drop the story for a sec.
What is actually happening in your body right now?
Not your opinion. Not your narrative.
What is true and factual? i.e. what would stand up in a court of law? 👀
Then remind yourself that you're not perfect and you never will be.
But you are powerful in each small, honest choice you make.
Side note:
I have personally found Emotional Freedom Therapy (aka "tapping") really powerful for this: a way to acknowledge the story and soften it without fighting it. There are dozens to choose from on Move With Adell if you want to explore that.
Agree to a pact with me? Let's not let those little lies keep us stuck, okay?
Adell 💋
*8 mechanisms of moral disengagement:
1- Moral Justification "I did it for the right reasons though"
2- Euphemistic Labelling "It's not lying...it's just bending the truth."
3- Advantageous Comparison "Well, at least I'm not as bad as that guy."
4- Displacement of Responsibility "I was just obeying the boss."
5- Diffusion of Responsibility "Everybody's doing it."
6- Distortion of Consequences "It's not a big deal."
7- Dehumanisation "Their suffering isn't the same as our suffering."
8- Attribution of Blame "They brought it on themselves."
Want to go way deeper with me? 👀
• Check out my upcoming IRL events
• Sign up to my next NeuroYoga TTC where I teach YOU how to blend yoga + neurology
• Join me on Move With Adell -- your brain-based yoga hub -- Click here to start your FREE trial.
• Check out the courses from Z-health, where I started my education in brain-based approaches: Click here for my discount codes on their first 3 courses!
• Get my book "Too Flexible to Feel Good: A Practical Roadmap to Managing Hypermobility"